It's been a while since I've made an update to this thing. I think part of my problem is I was frustrated. Frustrated with myself for not being at goal, frustrated with always having to pay attention to what I eat and never getting a break, frustrated with trying to find time to fit in exercise (and I don't even have children...), and just feeling "done" with this whole process.
But as I started to watch the weight fluctuate I guessed that this is how it probably all started in the first place, this is how I got to be almost 300 lbs to begin with, bit by bit, and apathy on my part. It was that apathy that I was feeling again, I just didn't want to be an active member in my health anymore. However I realized I had two choices: be an active member in my health or die... Ok, well maybe not that dramatic, but my quality of life was deteriorating, I could feel it. I was lethargic, moody, not active, and no desire to be active. That's not how I want to live.
So here I am, taking an active role again in my health and welfare. I am planning my meals again, making sure I write EVERYTHING down, even if it's something I "shouldn't" have I'm still keeping track of it. A new resolve has blossomed in me and away I go. I was listening to a Jillian Michaels podcast and she talked about how if you don't take care of yourself now, you'll be paying for yourself later when you're sick.
